To David: I'll be back

I swear on everything that is wild and wonderful in this world, I thought he was my Father-in-law.

David has Stage 4 throat cancer and is recovering in a Hamilton hospital from recent surgery to remove all his talking bits. I had not seen him since his diagnosis and I really wanted to pay him a visit.

I miss him.

I've known him for more than 20 years and he is a fantastic human being, so when I did a border run for beer two weeks ago (it had been a while), I worked in a visit to the Hammer for the way back.

It seemed like it was going to be one of those days, however. I was late getting started and then I hit traffic on the highway, which was unusual for a Saturday morning and also a little annoying as I had time restraints: I had to be back in Oshawa by 4:30 for work.

I crossed the border without incident and then hit my next snag when I rolled into the Consumer's Beverages outlet on Niagara Falls Boulevard in Niagara Falls, New York. I had two beers on my need list and both of them were absent from the shelves.

Stone Brewing's Unapologetic IPA was a collaboration Imperial IPA that was one of my top beers of 2014 - my  first year in craft beer - and  had been tweaked and re-released August 22 in honour of the brewery's 20 years in business. It  had been out nearly two weeks but had not yet been shipped here, so I was told, anyway.

That sucks. At least they'll have Stone's Citracado, the official 20th Anniversary beer that I decided I must have. But not on this day.

Hell's Bells, man.

I bought some other goodies and headed back to the border, with my next stop Hamilton and my father-in-law's hospital bed.

Grandpa David and the J Man

Which is where my next problem reared its ugly head. I never asked Christian-Ann which hospital David was in because I just assumed Hamilton had only one. Turns out the city has several hospitals and the first one I found - Hamilton General - was not the hospital I was looking for.

I discovered that inside at the nurses station, so I called my ex-wife, who steered me towards  St. Joseph's Healthcare on the other side of the city.

At least it was on the way home.

Once inside St. Joe's I made it up to the fourth floor and David's department. I got buzzed in, but there were no nurses about to ask where I could find dear old David.

So I poked my head in the first room I saw. I found a man who I thought was David.

He looked like David - a lot - and he had tubes running out of his throat, as befitting a man who just endured a total larynngectomy. So I naturally thought he was David.

He looked like he had put on some weight but I attributed that to bloating.

I asked him how he was doing and he shrugged. I asked him if was getting any sleep and he shook his head no. I asked if he was in pain and he nodded yes and I actually considered alerting a nurse when I heard that. I asked him if Lene (David's wife) had been in today and he looked at me funny, and I remembered Christian-Ann telling me he suffered from periodic bouts of delirium, so I didn't give it much thought.

I didn't know what else to say so I put my hand on his shoulder and I stayed with him for ten minutes while making occasional small talk.

And then I said I would leave him to rest and made my way out of the hospital and back to my car.

It was an emotional experience.

On the way back to Oshawa I called Christian and told her about my visit and casually mentioned I thought her Dad had put on some weight. I nearly drove off the road when she said he had lost about 50 pounds.

Oh. My. God.

I told her where the gentleman's room was and she started to laugh, explaining that David's room was on the other side of the nurses station.

I felt terrible and more than a little embarrassed. I had come all that way to see my Father-in-law and I never got to see him.

"Look on the bright side," Christian said, doing her best to cheer me up. "You probably made an old man's day."

I hope so. You hang in there David: I'm coming back to see you tomorrow. For real.

The best part of border runs? Sharing the beer

I may not have found the beers I was seeking in suburban Niagara Falls, N.Y., but I still made out like a bandit with some quality IPAs.

The sheer number of different beers found at U.S. beer stores - especially my cherished IPAs and their friends - is incredible and with all due respect to the LCBO, The Beer Store and various and sundry grocery stores, there's no contest when it comes to selection.

So I found some winners. A six of Ballantine IPA; a six-pack of 60 Minute IPA from Dogfish Head; a six of Tangerine Soul Style IPA from Green Flash; a bomber of Hop Stoopid from Lagunitas (eight per cent ABV); a bottle of Mach 10 (an Imperial IPA from Bear Republic); and because I couldn't walk out of there without something from Stone, a couple of bottles of RuinTen, their excellent Triple IPA.

That would be Paul Thebeerguy, Trevor and me

I was planning on dropping off a care package to Beer Bro Don on the way through Burlington, but we couldn't hook up because, well, time was my enemy, as I mentioned earlier. Sorry Don. (As a consolation, I do have a bottle of Legends Imperial Stout with my face on it, saved just for you.)

So when I got back I messaged Trevor - Everyone's Favourite Cellerman - and told him I had a few 'extra' bottles from my trip and would he like some?

He said he would be at Manantler in 15 minutes.

Trevor is a massive fan of legendary Delaware brewery Dogfish Head - if he had his way he'd kick Brewmaster Sam Calagione into retirement and take over his job - so I made sure he had a 60 Minute IPA in his gift pack, along with a Ballantine and the Tangerine Soul Style.

I had forgotten how delicious 60 Minute (East Coast Style, baby!) could be. Bitter and resiny, with marmalade and tropical fruit and a bit of honey-like sweetness. I could drink this all day and so could Trevor, but he thought the Ballantine was pretty cool as well.

Turns out he has a pal named Ballantine who is actually a distant relative of the Newark, N.J family who founded the brewery (now owned by Belgium's Duvel) way back in 1840.

That IS pretty cool.

I called Paul Thebeerguy next and we met at Buster Rhino's for a trade. My extra (like there is such a thing) Ruin Ten, a 10.8 per cent mega hop monster from Stone Brewing (Escondido, California), for a couple of brews from Paul's recent trip to Ottawa Valley brewery Calabogie: Black Donald, a Stout, and K & P Ale, a British Session Ale.

I'd of done the deal as a gift, but who am I to say no to free beer?

But those beers were for later and we were in a craft beer bar, so naturally we had to raid the new beer fridge, where I found (staying on the Ottawa theme) Bravado, an American Pale Ale from Tooth and Nail Brewing ("sweet, with subtle hop flavours"); and Covered Bridge Brewing's The Lumbersexual, a 3.8 per cent ABV Session IPA that sports one of the best labels I've seen this year. It was also damn good, with a great bouquet of tropical fruit, citrus and pretty flowers.

Paul opted for the Sweetback's Milk Stout from Rainhard (a hard yes to this one) and Rabble Rouser, a 6.8 per cent piney IPA from Tooth & Nail.

Lots more great beers in that new beer fridge. The rest will be for another time.

The Calabogie beers were enjoyed at home and for the record, the Black Donald tasted of roast graham cracker and minty freshness and was unlike any Stout I have ever had. And still very tasty. But the real winner was K & P Ale, which was "smooth and nutty and just a little bit sweet," which also describes my former wives. The best (and only) British Session Ale of my life.

Remember Kindergarten? The teacher was right. Sharing is good.

Cheers!